I am not sure why, but at some point today, I had this nagging urge to write down some notes for all my single friends. Consider this FREE and unsolicited advice that you may take or leave. And know that if we have a conversation in the future and you begin with: "I read your blog about this all those years ago, but..." I will kindly hug you, sit down and listen. Because even if you don't heed my advice, I will always be there for you and love you.
This really has precious little to do with my current situation...which is being in the Philippines, but it also has EVERYTHING to do with it. My husband flew out to Palawan on Monday to preach a 3 day crusade. After hearing he arrived safely, I was relieved and then he began telling me about how "rough" things were there. Nothing like we (spoiled) Americans are used to. While I do feel sorry for him, I am also QUITE PROUD of him as well. I am also a wee bit jealous because I am that wacky gal who ENJOYS roughing it (temporarily) for the adventure of it all.
So, are you ready for my little bits of wisdom? Brace yourself. HA!!
Girls: How can you tell if he is "Mr. Right"?
If he doesn't live for God now, chances are after the ceremony he won't either. It's a simple as that. I know, I know. He has promised you it is just a matter of timing, his job, his schooling, etc. Sorry, if he is too busy for God now, he will be too busy later when he is working to keep food on your table and clothes on your back. It will ALWAYS be something. Find a man who loves God and is sold out to the things of God. Period. This point in NON-NEGOTIABLE.
Does that handsome hunk have a job? If not, throw him out on his ear. STAT! Oh, sure...his little grin makes your heart go "pitter-pat", but that grin doesn't put money in the bank or food in the bellies of your future children. A man who doesn't work is totally worthless. Even if the guy you are dating has a job that keeps scheduling him to work on Friday nights and you can't go out like you'd like...that guy is the one who will do whatever it takes to make sure all the bills are paid (on time!!) and keeps a roof over your head. Giving up date night may seem like a big deal now, but knowing you have found someone who really loves you enough to TAKE CARE OF YOU, is priceless.
Now, fellas...before you get all in a huff because I am dogging on you (do people even still talk like that???), I have some advice for you as well...
Guys: How do you know that you finally find the Princess you want to make your Queen?
The all-time best place EVER to meet a great, godly girl is NOT in the foyer or lobby of the church. Nope. You are gonna find Mrs. Happy Ever After in one of two places: the prayer room or the altar. Period. That's it. That's the two places to look. The gal that is praying her visitor through to the Holy Ghost? She's the one. The one with the beautiful soprano voice singing during altar call with tears streaming down her face? Yep, she's a keeper. If she puts God first, she will be a better wife and mother. She will be a godly, submitted HELPMEET to you. If you have a calling into ministry, you will go MUCH FURTHER with a lady that also wants to serve the Lord.
If that gal you've been eyeing has trouble telling what size skirt actually fits her...pass her on by. Girls with skirts (tops, dresses, etc) too tight have ZERO respect for themselves. They subconsciously think the only way to "lure" a guy is to be bait. Wow...I just compared her to a worm. Yeah, that about sums it up. This gal probably has very little self confidence also. She will require a lot of "work" to keep happy. More money, a bigger house, a fancier car...the list goes on and on. She will think these *things* are what she needs to be happy or feel good about herself. You will literally go mad trying to please this gal. Stay away.
Really, these examples can apply for either gender. It all comes down to this: Put God first and He will show you the right one for you. I know it is tough falling asleep each night with tear-soaked cheeks and a tear-stained pillow because you are so lonely. But, these tears are not nearly as painful as tears of a man or woman who is married to someone who doesn't love them, doesn't care for them and wishes they had never married the other. Being alone is much less painful than being in a loveless marriage or one that has pulled you out of the church family.
I was a teenager (oh, so many years ago) and this became my "go-to" scripture:
"Delight thyself also in the Lord; and he shall give the the desires of thine heart." Psalm 37:4
When you stop praying for God to send you someone and start praying: "How can I serve you better Lord?", you will be surprised at how quickly God will answer that prayer...and all the others ones regarding your future.